The Joy Of Easy
I struggle with a lot of things on a day to day basis. My mood is one. I lose myself too easily in the past and it’s difficult to pull myself out of it.
Jogging is something I can control. It helps with my mental stability. By and large, I look forward to it as it helps me escape the confines of my mind and gives me space to breathe and assess shit properly.
I’ve maintained the run streak for over a year now because of how easily I run. I can bounce back from ultramarathons without any recovery time as I have nothing really to recover from.
I feel like a tank these days. Once I start moving I am confident than I can continue almost forever. The only problem in ultramarathons is the nausea I get towards the end of 100ks.
That’s why the ultra marathon last week was such a success for me. It got me out of the house for the day and I really enjoyed it apart from the slippery bits. But hey, I got out of my comfort zone. I can do trails.
Beating myself up about shit like last night is only going to lead me back to drinking again. I sometimes mistake ‘going easy on myself’ for ‘eating all of the things’ and I remain here in the position where I’m still 3lbs overweight.
I’m so close. I could achieve that target with 2 good weeks of eating and I know once I get there I will stay under that weight. I’ve learned my lesson about ‘carb loading’ for long runs. I don’t need to do it since I run at such a low intensity.
This year will be the year where I finally get a grip on the weight. I made huge progress last year and sometimes I don’t think about that. I focus on the 2 to 3 lbs I gained in October when I hit my weight target. Not on the 15lbs I lost over the course of the year.
So I’m gonna continue to enjoy running easily and go faster when the urge strikes.
I don’t want to worry about my weight ever again. I want to be able to run easily for 100km. I want to keep alcohol out my life. I want to get on with living my life instead of using food to regulate my moods.
I want to excel at my career so that I have the freedom to live and run anywhere in the world at any time.
I’m hitting my mid 30’s. I need to shit or get off the pot.