Taking A Week Off Running In Crete. This Holiday Is For Eating & Drinking Not Exercise.
As you may or may not know I am currently on holiday in Crete which is why I haven’t been posting very much of late.
So for a bit of a change I’ve decided to write a little journal of how my average day has went here.
I’ll be back to posting about running next week!
I start the day with a mouth as dry as a nun’s crack. I try to recall what happened the night before and worst case scenarios skirt around my head.
What if I wake up next to a Scottish psychopath who has knocked out all of my teeth with a toffee hammer?
Terror in my head.
Getting my thoughts together.
After a shower I start to feel all right and head into town.
The one thing that I’ve noticed about this area of Crete is the sheer number of stray cats about.
At first I thought I was hallucinating but they are fucking everywhere. Here’s a picture of a few of them forming the starting of a little kitty rock festival.
Today I went out and got a full English breakfast along with two tequila sunrises. It was only 12 noon, but I’m on holiday so I can drink like that and not worry that I’m heading into George Best territory.
I’m staying in a town called Stalis in Crete which is next to a legendary shithole called Malia and another prettier town called Cheronisou.
With the weather being absolutely beautiful I decided to walk off my breakfast by heading to Cheronisou. It was an 8 mile round trip.
It must have taken around an hour and a half to walk 4 miles but it was brilliant just being able to take in the sun and head out at my own pace.
I got lost in a little village called Koutouloufari which is based on a hill. It consists of a few taverns that are decorated (and quite possibly frequented) by masses of stray fucking cats.
Crete really is an amazing place to go out walking. For a moment you think you’re lost and then you find another little village that is more beautiful than the last one.
I’m staying half-board here so I get both breakfast and dinner for free.
The dinner buffet at this hotel is amazing. I’ve been eating Greek Salad every single night and I don’t think I’ll ever tire of the fucking thing. Fabulous.
And the waiters are amazing people too.
If I had to deal with gack-eyed Irishmen in gaudy shorts and t-shirts then I’d become incoherent with rage and/or stabby with kebab skewers.
Entertainment and the pub
There isn’t really that much going on nightlife wise here in Stalis. I could go to Malia which is just 1km down the road but it’s fucking hell on earth and expensive.
I’d rather just enjoy myself.
Nowadays a normal night out for me involves going out and drinking a few pints before finding a restaurant that sells takeaway Gyros.
Tonight for a change, I went to a place called Angelo’s Restaurant around the corner from the hotel. I got a Gyro plate, 2 pints of beer and a cocktail for 16 euro.
I’m slightly fucking frazzled now.
Anyway the entertainment in the hotel tonight is ‘Music Quiz Night’.
The bad part of my head wants to heckle the wrong answers to random questions in a poor attempt to affront the broads who are harassing the quizmaster to replay the question that contains the 5 second sample of ‘Sex On Fire’.
It’s by Queens of Leonard you fucking whores!
Retiring to my balcony
I love sitting on my balcony at night and listening to music. If it’s a clear night and I’m underneath the stars then I’ll fire up my iPad and the Star Walk application.
It’s amazing being able to pinpoint stars and planets. It’s humbling to think that each of those stars could well host planets that are thriving with life.
You’re staring at a star that could have……
- Dogs with mortgages.
- Politicians with integrity.
- Cats on benefits.
- Beer that screams when you drink it.
- You get the idea….
Tips for enjoying your holiday as an obsessive runner
- Don’t put pressure on yourself to run after a night out on the piss on holidays. You’ll just hate yourself and/or collapse after it.
- If you’re going on holiday then arrange it for after any of your key races. Last year I went to Portugal and the Costa Del Sol 2 weeks before Belfast 2012. It was a shit holiday as I was always worrying about running. Now that I’ve ran the Belfast Marathon 2013 I’m here and I don’t give a fuck about running. If it happens, it happens.
- Sometimes you just have to let yourself go with eating and drinking. This is my week for this shit after the past 2 marathons. There will be none of that guilt shit on this holiday.
- If you meet any Scottish women/men on holiday, kindly ask them to dispose of any toffee hammers that they may have on their person before getting intimate with them.