Saw A Fox Tonight. I Love Wildlife.
I hate St Patrick. He was a fucking cunt. Not only did he steal the snakes from Ireland but he also drove the foxes out.
I love seeing the urban foxes slinking about in the shadows in London when I’m running. I love nature and wildlife. It makes running so much more enjoyable when I’m animal spotting. You don’t get any shit off foxes. They are just ginger dogs with a growth problem.
I loved seeing the wild rabbits in Vienna by the Danube too.
We don’t have rabbits back home. The Paisley Dynasty ate them all. And Gerry Adams finished off the fucking squirrels. We talk about wildlife as vermin but badgers aren’t the ones fucking up the planet. We are the vermin. The disease. And we’re spreading fast. We’ve sold ourselves high on our own divinity and we think we can just shit everywhere littering the world with Abercrombie & Fitch, food court hell and spiralling credit card debt without it coming back to bite us.
We’re so far removed from reality that we’re waiting on salvation from magical supermen to rescue us from our own mess.
The asteroid is looming and it will be a deliverance for the squirrels who will survive, thrive and evolve into another wacky ape like species that will slowly kill itself through stress, mayonnaise and despair. They will nail a new wacky super-rodent to a billboard and the whole horrible cycle will start afresh.
Sometimes running helps me escape all of these thoughts. It’s good to be out there alone with the foxes. I did 7 miles tonight and I’m only 3 miles off 40 for the week. I’m gonna spend the rest of tonight watching nature documentaries.
I can’t find any featuring your Mother so I’m having to make do with this one.