Running To Overcome Depression And To Cure Anxiety. Is Jogging A Natural Anti-Depressant?
When I was 272lbs I was quite depressed. I’d rarely leave the house as I was embarrassed about openly wheezing and sweating in public.
I struggled to find clothes that fit, me so it was easier just to stay inside on my own.
I remember praying for it to rain so that I’d have an excuse for being wet.
“No this is not sweat, can’t you see it was fucking raining? What do you mean it’s been sunny all day?”
The more I stayed inside, the harder it became to motivate myself to get my ass outside.
If I was forced out into a restaurant I’d be paranoid that others were staying at me. I’d be concerned that seats weren’t gonna hold my weight and I’d end up my ass to rapturous mock applause from everyone around me.
I wasn’t a happy camper.
The further I withdrew within myself, the more I blamed others for avoiding me. This was madness. I was not making myself available for anyone just because of my own hangups.
Anyway it all started to change once I started running. When you’re outdoors jogging you’re forced to confront those who you feared would mock you at the start. And you know what? It isn’t that bad!
You quickly learn that those who mock you harbour deep problems themselves. Their taunts and insults didn’t matter as much as running did to me at the time, as I knew that I was moving forward with my life.
With running comes weight loss and with weight loss came better running. I started to enjoy being outdoors more as I could fit into nicer clothes and became less self conscious about my appearance.
I stopped withdrawing into myself so much. I didn’t drink nearly as much too as I didn’t see the point in begin hungover. Hangovers typically mean no running.
The social aspect of jogging is incredible. Before, I had no real hobbies other than watching TV and sitting around feeling sorry for myself. Now I love belonging to the crazy bunch of bastards who call themselves runners. It’s fantastic meeting new people at races. It seems that us runners are typically very alike.
Obsessives and depressives.
Ultimately I credit running and running alone with regaining my sanity. It had been my salvation in what were some increasingly bleak times.
If you are feeling depressed then running might be your salvation too. I’ve tried medication in the past to feel better about myself, but I always feel worse once I stop the tablets. It’s not the answer. My problems remain underneath the drug haze. When I’m running on my own I have time to contemplate what really matters in life and come up with some real answers.