More Painful Bleeding From Runner’s Nipple. I’m Putting The Chaffing Behind Me With Weight Loss And Lube!
One of the problems with gaining a little weight over the Christmas period is that I’m suffering from nipple chaffing again.
In recent months it hadn’t been so much of an issue. It only seems to happen when I gain weight.
For example the picture below is of me in the Great Birmingham Run in 2012.
My right tit is weeping from me pumping my legs furiously through the last mile. At the time I was about 215lbs and really not in great shape.
Faithful, reliable titties.
But my tits are like faithful friends that begin to cry whenever I’ve been eating too much pie.
And they haven’t stopped crying over the past few days.
It’s time for change and I’m acting.
A tale of two bloody runs
So if you haven’t been following me on the blog or on Facebook, I have been exceptionally lazy over the holiday period and had only ran once up until yesterday.
I set about to rectify that with a 10 miler.
It wasn’t a great run in fairness.
Ever since I’ve gained the 7 pounds I’ve struggled to sustain even my slow run pace on normal runs.
It’s very disheartening, but I see no other way through it than to eat better and to keep on running.
This was the aftermath after the run.
I don’t know what the hell it is with the Rock N Roll Marathon technical tees but they seriously munch on my chest.
It looks like I’ve been breastfeeding two hungry snow leopards. The weird thing is that my left nipple wasn’t even cut when I observed it after the right.
For a moment I thought I was suffering from stigmata.
Run number two
Once bitten, twice shy.
Today, I plastered my body with industrial lubricant, like a Geordie girl with an itchy dot and evil in her eyes.
The run again wasn’t much better than the last one, but I did everything I could to protect my aching right tit.
I pulled the shirt away from it like a wary guarding Mother over-protecting her special Son.
Leave him alone, he’s been through enough already you monsters!
This was the result after today’s 9.5 miler.
At the time I was frustrated to see that I was once again haemorrhaging from my breasts, but with guarded optimism I can see that it’s nowhere near as bad as yesterday.
As a runner you’ve always gotta look at things in an optimistic light, otherwise you’d scare yourself into believing that your tits are never gonna stop bleeding.
Tonight I’ve been moisturising and celebrating 100 miles for the month.
But not at the same time. Once you get Vaseline in your piss hole, you learn a very valuable life-lesson.
I’m trying to be practical now and have focused on applying healing cream to my right boob.
Thing were OK up until about an hour ago when I accidentally hit my vulnerable tit in the face with my Telecaster.
Fortunately no damage was caused by this mishap.
I’m a bit stunned, that’s all.
But I’m celebrating now.
For the 24th month in a row I’ve managed a 100+ mile month.
Today’s 9.5 miler takes me to 107 miles for December and I’m hoping over the next 2 days to beat last month’s 132 miles tally.
I’ll be OK as long as my tits are OK.