I’ve Struggled To Record A Calorific Deficit Over The Past Week
As the title infers, I haven’t been able to build any momentum with recording calorific deficits. It’s stupid. I’ve been eating all my calories at night and placing them in the same day and therefore not having enough during the day. Then I give up promising that I’ll start again tomorrow. It’s the same shit I used to do with heavy drinking.
I’m on track today and I’m upping my efforts. When I have one bad day it shouldn’t be the end of my attempts to eat better.
Part of the problem is that I’ve only been averaging 2 miles a day
My confidence for running has disappeared due to the weight gain. It’s absurd. I’m honestly struggling to do 5km now.
Outside of myself, I think it’s good when overweight people start to run and there’s way too much stigma on being overweight on society.
To actually do something about losing weight you have to have some self esteem to begin with and any movement that can improve esteem and other areas of mental health are to be applauded.
That doesn’t stop it sucking. I don’t understand why I can’t apply it to myself and my current situation.
First of all the self consciousness is draining. Clothes don’t fit as well so you’re less willing to go outside either to run or to run errands or do normal shit. I can’t sit down at my desk without my back hurting and that then fuels the fire of self hatred for letting myself get that way.
This feeds into the spiral of overweight living . Life becomes more difficult for yourself so you eat or drink more to cope with your emotions which makes all forms of exercise more difficult which makes your mood lower and more likely to resort to food or drink to escape.