I’ve Decided I’m Gonna Run Commute To My Train From Work Each Evening After A Nightmare Experience Tonight.
I’ve started a new job in the past week that requires a train substitution with a very tight transfer time in between.
For this reason I’ve decided to run commute on the way back from work (if I don’t catch my train I get home at 8pm rather than 7pm, so it’s important!).
I did exactly this tonight, only I wasn’t wearing running gear.
I was in my office clothes with a suit jacket and jeans on.
It was a hellish run through the centre of Lisburn where I had to avoid many angry men with even angrier dogs.
I brushed past one such dog and it’s owner let it sniff my crotch. I stormed away before a synapse fired it’s jaw into lockdown on my ball-sack.
I cannot go to Vegas with a sack with only one unit in it.
I already walk like John Wayne whilst possessing a full set.
Fuck knows how I’d get around if the cables in my bag were hanging out all jagged like bad hallway wiring installed by a drunken Irish electrician.
Pedestrians were alarmed by my heavy breathing.
It was infuriating having people turn around before I reached them. I might have been breathing all rapey, but that’s because I ran 11.6 miles at 5am this morning.
I was exhausted. So many of them stared me up and down as if to say “Well what the fuck do we have here? I didn’t realise that the Kebab shop closed at 6!”
I got to Belfast Great Victoria Street station and my suit jacket had patches of sweat through it. I wanted to go into the cafe to buy a sandwich for my 2nd train but the security guard outside gave me a very dirty look.
He did not approve of my sweating.
Nor my rosy cheeks.
Nor my general demeanour.
I could see all sorts of accusations flaring in his eyes and I longed to take the closest cheese and tomato panini, slap it down on an outside table and heat it myself with the aid of a loud rasping howler of a fart, before demanding an instant rebate of the 20% Toaster tax.
I went into WH Smith to buy some train chocolate instead and that’s what I’m snacking on now as I write this silly post.
Anyway here are my plans for running to the station from work.
I’m gonna bring my high visibility vest, Garmin, shorts, tech shirt, deodorant and wipes to work each day in my Rock N Roll Vegas holdall and run commute to the station at night.
It is only 1.5 miles to my target but I’ve little over 20 minutes to complete the run in.
At the very least it will mean a chance for a little speed work and will result in some extra mileage over the course of the week.
It will keep my fit and allow me more time at home at night to write this silly posts.
It’s good to be back. Only 11 days until Vegas!