I Don’t Like Self-Help Running/Writing Conferences.
[Background : this is a post about a running/writing conference that I was gonna go to but I found out it costed £40 and decided against paying for things I kinda know how to do.]
£40 to learn how to write about running? Holy fucking hell. The audacity deserves applause.
For that kinda fee you’d expect to be patted on the balls by Mo Farah and slapped in the arse by Hemingway and stroked off by your own choice of Plath or Ginsberg in the car park.
I’m all for capitalism. If it wasn’t for capitalism I’d be fucking dead on the streets of Holborn long ago.
But conferences that ‘teach’ people to write really bother me.
You aren’t gonna learn anything about writing from any fucking dull idiot in a conference. They are gonna shit out the same dull hackneyed horseshit about how you could MAYBE get to their level if you were to somehow follow their lead until the better end that saw them make money, not through their own writing but through CONFERENCES.
You don’t want to get to their level!
You can exceed it and move far past it with passion, hate, love and whatever else fucking drives you.
If you want to write about running, WRITE ABOUT FUCKING RUNNING. These fucking tedious imbeciles aren’t gonna teach you anything about it. Just write. Shit out your thoughts. In any form you can. When and where you want to.
You are the expert in your own field and what you write is legitimate. Write about your strengths and weaknesses and have some fun.