Eating Like A King
My aim is to get to Brighton by sunset in 3 weeks tomorrow. In 2016 I got to the top of Ditchling Beacon just as the sun had disappeared completely and it made the last 10k a little bit harder as I was having to navigate in the darkness with my head torch on.
It will be a happy time. Running should be about happy times even though I’m a miserable cunt.
The beauty of London 2 Brighton is that the first 25k is mostly flat and through towns. It gives me a chance to settle into the run.
I never settled in the Isle of Wight Challenge and it was just embarrassing for me. I’m meant to have gone through a transformation over the last year and a half, yet I dropped out of a race I’d been training for, for months.
I gave it my all
I don’t believe in giving 110%. That’s how people get sectioned. I wasn’t gonna spend another 27 hours out there battling around the cliffs of Ventnor like some kind of war hero.
I have a lot of belief in myself when it comes to my ability to run for long periods of time in a straight line. It only becomes difficult when I’m off road or running up hills a lot. But that’s the challenge we face as runners and we have to be ready for it.
Ultra running would be easy if it was all flatness and straight lines. It’d also be boring as fuck. The same thing applies to life. When shit gets tough you’ve got to be ready for it!
Instead of dwelling on the races I dropped out of, I’m concentrating on the runs that went well, namely Liverpool to Manchester and of course Country to Capital in January which was great.
I got some good advice from Sarah on my last post about trying to incorporate one healthy thing into my diet a day. It makes sense. I’m embarrassed by how I eat. My diet is like that of a 13th century despot King. I’m fucking around with diabetes and gout. I’m even having duck for breakfast.
I’d be making so much more progress if I had my eating under control. I’ve been outrunning a bad diet for a considerable amount of time now, but it feels like I’m gaining nothing from it. There isn’t any joy in being addicted to the wrong foods.
I eat to escape negative thoughts and feelings. I have a lot of them and that makes for a lot of compulsive eating. It’s strange how the eating doesn’t seem to stop the negative thoughts. If anything it makes them much worse.
How is this any different to boozing? I’m using food as a way to cope and it only works until the food is gone.
Day 5 of 31
|Calories in||Calories out||Deficit|