Do You Back Down Or Do You Go Again?
Remind me to book somewhere warmer if I’m in this same position next year. I don’t want to go outside as it’s biting cold. The hotel here is great but I do feel pretty bloody lonely in here all the time.
Since my accommodation is up here on Saturday, I’ve been looking at flights to Portugal from Berlin and found one for 9 euro. It’s tempting. It’s about £200 for another week here in Leipzig but about £110 for a place in Portimao for 7 days.
I’ll sleep on it and see how I feel about it tomorrow.
I just went to McDonalds and was accosted by a young woman who was quite clearly off her tits on disco biscuits. She threw a makeup mirror at me and missed by a country mile. I looked at the ground and saw a notebook and other artefacts of sanity from her bag and thought about what it could have been that had went so wrong..
She’d smashed everything she’d owned. I wanted to cry. But I also wanted to get a safe distance away from her before the biscuits caught hold of the other side of her brain and brought her aim back up to par. My head is missile fodder and my nervous demeanour would’ve likely drew the projectiles in, in hordes.
Not going down again.
I’ve had two really good runs in Leipzig. Better pavements here than Prague and the traffic is quieter.
I’ve decided not to fall into a rut again. Every day counts. I’ve recorded a calorific deficit for the first day in maybe 2 weeks. That’s quite incredible considering how hopeless I was feeling on Monday. The cold weather has played a part in this. I’d rather not freeze over a shitty Mars Bar.
I need to extend this into 2 days in a row. This is how the magic starts. This is where the fightback begins but I need to realise that I’ve only ever been fighting back against my own addictive self destructive shit.
Outside of that depressive crap is a beautiful world.