Celebrating My Long Run Today With A Domino’s Pizza.
Today was long run day and I surprised myself with a 10.25 mile run at a 10 minute mile pace dead on. I was only expecting to do 7 miles today so to say that I’m happy is an understatement. I felt the flow all the way.
After a long run I love nothing more than to kick back, watch some documentaries on the Youtube and order a pizza from Domino’s.
Don’t get me wrong, I know their pizzas are a fucking rip off and they probably give you 43 different types of heart disease, not to mention rickets. But I am addicted to them. And I enjoy ordering them.
I would rather eat something truly wholesome like a Domino’s Hot N Spicy than a plate of fruit or vegetables. The thought of eating veg still makes me want to drill a fucking hole in my brain. Cauliflower, sprouts, broccoli, all of that awful green junk shit is eaten by rabbits for a reason.
They don’t know any better.
The problem with health fanatics is that they’ve got it into their head that they’ll live forever if they eat nothing but tofu and carrots.
All they’re doing is increasing their life expectancy to the point where living will be deeply unpleasant anyway. Who wants to get to 90? You’ll have no money, won’t be able to run and your brain will have dissolved into a wet plate of mush and desperation.
Reality TV and spinach will feed on what’s left of your mind like flies on a dead dog’s arse.
I try. I do.
I still try to do my bit with regards to ‘healthy’ eating. I try to make better choices. I am having a small Hot N Spicy with Reduced Fat cheese instead of the full fat version.
Granted the Reduced Fat cheese is probably neurotoxic and will cause an acute episode of psychosis where I’ll believe that God’s trapped inside of my fridge and that the only way to free Him is to shave my head and balls and saw off the refrigerator door.
It will still be worth it for the taste sensation.
And each pizza takes about a month off my life. At this rate I’m set to expire at about 49. A fare old innings for someone born and bred in Belfast.
Update at 20:08 GMT
I’m atoning for my earlier sins with 4 Jaffa Cakes for supper. I feel like shit after the Domino’s. I dunno what sorta flour they put into the pizza base but it totally fucks up my sinuses and makes me feel like I’m gonna shit out glass from my nostrils.
A can of Cherry Coke might just be what the doctor ordered.
Whenever I feel down like this I try to make light of my situation by watching truly grim documentaries about the developing world. Tonight it’s this documentary on two Ukrainian girls with HIV. Ironically enough it is more fun than watching the X-Factor.