Are You Brave Enough To Find Out How You’ll Die As A Runner?

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5 Responses

  1. Jes says:

    this is great! it was also spot on about me being a true pioneer in running deformity :)

  2. Nikki says:

    I never knew Paula Radcliffe was even aware of my work.

    And funnily enough, I have been hit by a group of teenagers with a bag of shoes to the stomach (actual true fact) so the nature of my death is totally in the realms of possibility.

  3. Bernie Elber says:

    Well, now that I know how I die (in another sweet, long 14 years), it’s time to get back to my regular diet of pizza with chorizo, chicken and bacon topping…
    Oh, and Iwan Thomas can go and find a quiet corner to punch himself in the face. It’s called the Bernie shuffle and it is really efficient.
    My demise:

    You will die running on Wednesday 18th August 2027 during a fartlek workout.
    You will go into this run contemplating becoming a hairy Communist for lent.
    You will be forced to stop in the street after having your path blocked by a single-mother with a jogger. In your rage your heart explodes like a car back-firing.
    Death will happen 7 miles into your favourite route.
    “No one ran quite as awkwardly as Bernie Elber. A true pioneer in running deformity” – Iwan Thomas

  4. Angie says:

    “A true pioneer in running deformity!” Ha! Almost brought tears to my eyes! Fun post!

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