A Run Inspired By A New Low In Covent Garden This Time Last Week
Today I went out and ran 7.08 miles and it was arguably even more difficult than my 1st run back on Wednesday. It’s gonna take a while for me to regain my fitness but I’m heading in the right direction with each run.
Found myself through a new low.
My new low point came last Friday in Covent Garden after I’d published the book. I’d reluctantly climbed the 200 steps up from the platform to street level and spent 30 minutes breathlessly stalking the backstreets of Holborn furious with myself for losing so much fitness over the course of the month.
I then went to Subway where I ordered a 6 inch Spicy Italian on wheat bread with jalapeños, pickles and BBQ sauce and it was the most depressing sandwich ever. I knew I did not deserve it. I’d spent too many shameful nights indoors eating chicken and drinking Jamaican tonic wine. I was just eating for the sake of it to try to block out the reality that I was on the wrong path again.
I just felt like shit that entire night as I was finally coming to terms with my lifestyle choices. My body hurt and I couldn’t blame it for how it was. It was my own doing. I was faced with every bad decision I’ve made over the last while. What troubled me most was that I’d just published a self help book and I was a fucking mess myself.
Failure again my friend.
I’ve lost fitness before. I’ve gained weight more times than I care to mention but this time was more worrying as I’ve never gained 10+ pounds in a month.
I wasn’t going to give in and wallow. I missed running and I wanted to get back into it but I was so fucking scared of going out and facing reality. I wanted to remain in denial and continue feeding my face with 6″ Subway sandwiches.
The truth is that I let the stress of finishing the book get on top of me and I used it as excuse to indulge in excess. I no longer have that excuse and have to work my way back into shape again. It’s quite humbling to be out of breath so much now, but I accept how it is and how I am.
That’s the beauty of a new lifestyle choice. You don’t have to wakeup and start afresh 100 pounds heavier. You just need to pay attention to the voice inside that says “you’re fucking up, sunshine. Get your house in order!”. You have to be true to who you and what you want to be. And I no longer want to be that depressed bastard who mindlessly munches on sandwiches.
From now on my Subways will be well earned!
To celebrate the weekend my book Angry Jogger is on sale until 15:00 GMT tomorrow. It’s almost at half price so get it now before I put the price back up tomorrow. It will make a great present for someone you hate (if you no longer have the energy to shit in their mailbox).