8 Reasons Why I Haven’t Been Enjoying Running Recently.
I was gonna post this originally last week as I was struggling with motivation to the point where I hated every single run.
It still applies a little now but I’ve recovered and enjoyed myself more this week.
But here are 8 reasons why I haven’t been enjoying running recently.
- It’s repetitive – “One foot in front of the other. One foot in front of the other. When’s the next race? What’s the next target?” It gets really boring even if you change the setting and the distance and the schedule. I only enjoy running when I find my inner calm. All of the goals I set myself really ruin it and it is part of the reason I fucking hate it all sometimes.
- It’s never ending – You never really hit a point in training where you’re genuinely happy with yourself. Even if you were the best runner in the world and you won marathons you’d still be worried about defending your titles. I have nightmares that I’m not meeting my running goals. Goals remind me too much of school and being depressed.
- I’ve been setting myself arbitrary targets – ‘ I need to make a 40 mile week this week or else!’ Or else what? Does any of it really matter? Surely the most important part of running is the act itself? The more I think about running the less I enjoy it. The more I do it without thinking about it the more I love it.
- “You have to run!” – I’ve no choice but to run and to try my best for the 100k but at the same time it’s kinda strangling any joy I ever got from my running. My best ever runs are always spontaneous and never part of any training regime. I’m gonna get back there after June though!
- Mind numbing – In order to enjoy running you either have to get off on the runners high or on something else around it. If you’re trapped inside your head counting miles like I often am it’s so fucking tedious and boring.
- I’m a sweaty motherfucker – I am moving again on Wednesday and it’s largely to do with the fact that I sweat like fuck when I run and that sweat has been annoying my housemates.. I would like to say that I’ve been deliberating trying to annoy them with my sweat in the last week but I haven’t. When I do get outside to run I dream that I’m trampling on their heads and run even further.
- It is very hilly around here and I hate finishing a run by going uphill – I normally love the hills but around here you can’t move a mile in any direction without dropping 70m. Sometimes I want to run on flat. When I was running back home I’d do a course where I climbed most of the hills in the early half of the run and finish downhill. I fucking hate the thought of having to climb so much when I’m tired. I gave in today after 11 miles because of it.
- Out of practice and out of confidence – When I say I’m out of practice I’m saying that I haven’t been keeping up with the 50+ mile weeks I had planned for myself when I first came over here. It’s kinda dented my confidence. It all goes back to arbitrary targets I guess.